Had it not been for some unexpected snow on the roads, today's nine mile run would have been...well, pretty easy! It was great, I felt great - except for the times I was running in slush/snow uphill! I am feeling confident with the half marathon a mere 36 days away.
However, I have to tell you that this morning when the alarm went off I was not a happy camper.
I woke up at 4:13 a.m. from a work nightmare (have them ALL the time) - this one was enough to make me sit right up in bed and, once awake, made my mind run in several different directions. I finally fell back to sleep around 6 a.m. and boom - the alarm went off at 7 a.m. I was tired, cramped up and cranky. Mentally I just wasn't there. One thing I've learned with all this running is that the most important "thing" I need to run is the right mental state. When I get "in the zone" I can just cruise. I would argue running is more of a mental challenge than a physical challenge!
This morning as I started coming up with a million and one reasons why I simply would not be able to run nine miles today, I thought of a quote I recently read: "The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start," John Bingham.
Yes! John Bingham is correct!
I've lost exactly 60 pounds since I started running. My goal is to lose at least 30 more to get back to the weight I was in 2004 when I started working for the organization I work for now.
It's a miracle someone weighing as much as I did (and it was A LOT) could ever muster the physical and mental strength to start running.
What inspired me? Well, first, definitely being at my heaviest weight ever. Second, my dad was diagnosed with cancer and that put so much in to perspective and three, I lost my favorite aunt to cancer three months after my dad was diagnosed. My aunt was diagnosed with brain cancer when I was a toddler and the fact she lived as long as she did was simply amazing - however, her quality of life was horrendous. She spent the last few years of her life on a feeding tube. She was about my age when she was diagnosed with cancer...and when she died it got me thinking about all that she never got to do in life because of her illness. Running was one thing I could do in her honor because it was something she could never do herself in her 30s.
When it was tough to keep going, especially in the beginning when I could literally only run a few blocks, I thought of her - immobile in a nursing home on a feeding tube - and thought about how much she would have loved to be able to stand up and run.
Here I am on the brink of running this half marathon - with Aunt Vicki and my dad as my motivation to keep me going when the going gets tough!
P.S. I have to tell you - even the touchy-feely stuff couldn't motivate me this morning. What it took today was simply jamming out as loud as I could to some of my favorite running songs! Four songs and I was ready to rock!!! Some of my faves include - "Don't Stop the Music" by Rihanna, "Raise Your Glass" by Pink, and, the blast from the fast, "Flashdance (What a Feeling)" by Irene Cara.
No comments:
Post a Comment